It’s Talladega, Baby!!
Once again. The Amp Energy 500 tees off in a few minutes, but it just doesn’t seem the same as it did this spring, or in years past. The long shadow of Jimmie Johnson looms over the Talladega Superspeedway. It doesn’t feel right. The excitement has been whisked away like the autumn leaves. And the trees are like jilted brides stripped bare by their bachelors.
Let’s try this again.
It’s Talladega, Baby!!
Nope. It just doesn’t feel right. I feel a bit cheated by the whole of things this season. I feel especially cheated by the irrevocable fact of Nature that qualifying on Friday was rained out, and the field was set by owner points. Which means, you guessed it, Jimmie Johnson and his damned ability gets a head start that he doesn’t need on everybody else.
Now while Talladega is always a crap-shoot…and the Big One can happen at anytime and wipe out an entire season of effort. The chances, to be honest, are slim that Jimmie Johnson will be adversely affected by anything that happens today at Talladega.
So what else is there to look forward to, guys. Well, it’s Talladega, and that means TITS! Right?
Sorry guys. Not this time I’m afraid. The mood has been spoiled by the evil mechanations of Chad Knaus. Blame it all on him. Blame it all on Jimmie Johnson and his damned ability.
Sorry guys, no tits this time. I know it’s not Talladega without ’em. But…aww fuck it….
Here ya go….!!
It’s Talladega, Baby!!!
There ya go, guys. Something to see while waiting for the Big One.
Is there anyway I can not get melancholy over Jimmie Johnson's abilities and still be an ass-man. I mean, itty-bitty waist and a round thing in my face while I watch the race. TITs are good, but to feel the excitement of a good win, I need a little cushion for the pushin. Oh well, if dreams were Pamela Anderson, or Selma Blair. What a minute! Did someone say that Danica would be doing karoke this friday at Chubbys?